Sunday, 21 March 2010

Giggles have set in AGAIN !!!!!!!!!!!

Ive spent a couple of hours on Facebook today catching up with old friends and generally having fun.

At the moment a few of us are having a bit of an ongoing competition to see who can come up with the funniest/wittiest status lines. This has been going on since Thursday. I thought that I would share some with you as they have really made me howl today.

Matt: I just opened the door to a 6ft cockroach. It punched me in the face and told me to **** off. Apparently there is a nasty bug going round

Dee: The kids next door just asked me to have a water fight - so I thought Id come and update my staus while Im waiting for the kettle to boil

Me: Im changing my name to Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz as the only men I seem to attract are either cowards, have no heart or dont have a brain.

Me: I just checked my bank statements and I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life.....If I die tomorrow !

Me: Some people are under the impression that I think the world revolves around me. What utter nonsense. Everyone knows the world revolves around the sun.........which shines out of my arse!

Mark: I just asked my granny if she had seen my LSD pills that I left on the table. She said "Sod that. Have you seen that dragon in the kitchen?"

Debbie: just failed to stop a noisy fart leaking out in the queue at Tescos. Helloooooooooooo Asda

Ian: For sale. One parachute. Used once. Never opened. Small stain........

Tina: Freezing tempertures in Liverpool this morning. Reports say it was so cold a scouser was seen with his hands in his own pockets.

Matt: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see us without an erection, make us a sandwich.

Matt: If you watch Thelma and Louise backwards,its about 2 women with a flying car who slowly realize their place is in the kitchen

Tina: So, is it too soon to ask Whoopie Goldberg if she's heard from Patrick Swayze yet?

Totally irreverant, not particularly PC, but I love every one of my "off the wall" friends x


  1. Happy birthday! I hope you are doing something special.
    Lots of love
    Auntie M xxxxxxxx

  2. Thanks Auntie Mo xxx and thank you for the card xx
    I just had the girls round for the evening and stunned them all with my skills in the kitchen
    :-) (cooking that is - NOT being able to drink a glass of wine as quickly as Keith Floyd) hehe
    And I have a wonderful recipe to share with you if you dont already have it..... White Chocolate and Baileys cheesecake mmmmmmmmm that went down a treat x

  3. I hope you took a photo of the cheesecake. Yes, please, I'd love the recipe.

  4. erm didnt last long enough for a photo ;-)
    But I shall email you the recipe to your email account and hope you enjoy it as much as I <ahem) WE did x


Thank you very much for taking the time to comment on my waffle. I'll reply when Im next online.